Plot

Chapter 4 - The Uncomfortable Truth

I didn't sleep that night.

While Vanessa slept soundly beside me under our eight-hundred-thread-count Egyptian cotton sheets, her back turned to me, I lay on my back staring at the coffered ceiling. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw Elise’s face outside the discharge office.

The way her gray cardigan hung loosely off her frail frame. The way her collarbones protruded like thin branches beneath winter ice. The hollows in her cheeks that used to feature deep, warm dimples when she laughed.

At 5:30 in the morning, I quietly slipped out of bed, threw on a dark sweater and jeans, grabbed my keys, and walked out into the crisp autumn dawn.

I didn't go to my office.

I drove across town, away from the manicured lawns and gated communities of the northern suburbs, into the older, blue-collar neighborhood where Elise’s sister, Norine, lived. Norine was a high school biology teacher, fierce, fiercely protective, and a woman who had despised me with every fiber of her being from the moment I asked Elise for a divorce.

I pulled my car up to the curb outside Norine’s modest two-story craftsman house. The porch light was on.

I sat in the car for twenty minutes, my palms sweating against the leather steering wheel. I knew what I was walking into. I knew Norine had every right to slam the door in my face, to throw boiling water on me, to scream until the neighbors called the police.

I got out anyway.

I walked up the creaking wooden steps of the porch and knocked on the door.

Three minutes passed. Then the deadbolt clicked.

The door opened, held by a heavy brass security chain. Norine looked out through the gap, wearing a faded flannel bathrobe, her hair pulled back into a messy bun, dark circles carved under her eyes.

When she saw me, her expression went from groggy confusion to pure, unadulterated venom.

“Get off my porch, Grant,” she said, her voice like jagged iron.

“Norine, please. Just five minutes.”

“I have nothing to say to you. If you don't leave in ten seconds, I’m calling the cops and telling them an intruder is threatening me.”

She moved to slam the door, but I wedged the toe of my boot into the frame.

“Please!” I begged, my voice breaking. I didn't care about my pride. I didn't care that I was an executive at a premier investment firm begging on a damp suburban porch at six in the morning. “Norine, I know about the cancer. My mother told me yesterday. Just tell me how she is. Tell me the truth. Please.”

Norine stopped.

Through the four-inch opening, I saw her chest rise and fall rapidly. Her hands were shaking. Slowly, deliberately, she unlatched the brass chain and swung the front door wide open.

She didn't invite me in. She stood squarely on the threshold, blocking the entrance to the warm living room behind her.

“You want the truth?” Norine whispered, her eyes burning with tears she refused to shed. “The truth is that my sister spent the last fourteen months undergoing twelve rounds of aggressive systemic chemotherapy that burned her veins from the inside out. The truth is that while you were vacationing in Saint-Tropez for your honeymoon, Elise was huddled over a bucket on my bathroom floor, vomiting so hard that she burst the blood vessels in her eyes.”

Every word struck my chest like a physical blow. I couldn't breathe.

“She lost all her hair, Grant. She lost thirty-five pounds. She couldn't eat solid food for three weeks straight after her second resection surgery,” Norine continued, her voice trembling with a decade’s worth of repressed fury. “And do you know what broke my heart the most? One night, when her fever hit 104 and she was delirious with sepsis, she woke up crying. She reached out for your hand, Grant. She thought you were still sitting beside her in our guest room. She kept whispering, ‘Grant, I’m so cold. Please bring the heavy blanket from the closet.’”

A sob tore out of my throat before I could stop it. Hot, scalding tears flooded my eyes and spilled down my cheeks.

“I didn't know,” I wept, covering my face with my trembling hands. “I swear to God, Norine, I didn't know.”

“Of course you didn't know!” Norine spat, stepping closer, her finger jabbing hard into my chest. “Because you didn't want to know! You wanted your clean slate. You wanted your gorgeous twenty-something marketing girlfriend and your sports car and your penthouse lifestyle! You erased thirteen years of loyalty because you hit forty and decided you wanted to feel young again!”

“How is she now?” I asked desperately, wiping my tears with the sleeve of my sweater. “Yesterday at the hospital... what was the procedure?”

Norine took a ragged breath, leaning against the doorframe as if the exhaustion of the past year had suddenly caught up to her all at once.

“The cancer spread to her pleural lining six months ago,” Norine said quietly. “Yesterday was a pleurodesis. They drained nearly two liters of malignant fluid from around her right lung so she could breathe without suffocating. The doctor told us yesterday morning that standard treatments have stopped working. If she doesn't get into the targeted clinical trial at Johns Hopkins by next month... she has six months left. Maybe eight.”

The ground beneath my feet seemed to dissolve completely.

Six months.

“How much is the trial?” I choked out.

Norine gave a bitter, dry laugh. “Her insurance denied coverage. They classified it as experimental. The upfront deposit just to be admitted into the trial is two hundred and fifty thousand dollars. We’ve remortgaged this house. I emptied my teacher’s pension. We’ve raised eighty thousand. We’re short. We’re dangerously short, and her intake appointment is in three weeks.”

Norine looked at me with pure exhaustion.

“Now go away, Grant. Elise is sleeping upstairs. She had a terrible night with post-op pain, and the last thing she needs is to wake up and see the man who broke her soul standing on our porch.”

Norine stepped back and closed the door.

May you like

The deadbolt clicked.

I stood on the porch in the gray morning light, the cold wind whipping through my sweater, feeling utterly, irrevocably hollow.

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